This is not a theological discussion, it’s a practical one for leaders who want to think about ways to reach people for Jesus Christ. Imagine how exciting it is to discover churches actively seeking to be spiritually “in tune”, Kingdom of God-centric, and attractive to newcomers at the same time. This piece is based on several churches that each have long lists of “atta-church” credits to their collective name.

No matter how we feel about it, our culture communicating via the social media platform is here for the long term. There is no getting away from it. If your ministry doesn’t yet have a website, or if it already has a Facebook Page, you may want to take a moment and consider what is on your immediate horizon. Does the screen shot above look familiar? Next week on March 30th, the social media giant Facebook, will be changing the way we do church business with our social mediums. Facebook has already rolled out their new “Timeline” layout as an option for those who were in the know. Some have embraced the new visual stimulus package, and others have not. Be aware, next Friday, you won’t have a choice in the matter. However, the new layout may not be all that bad for ministries with tight purse strings. For many of us, our small donation dependent budget’s haven’t yet grown to afford a website, much less a designer or programmer to create one. Facebook’s new Timeline layout may be a bit of answered prayer, if done correctly. With the new visual format and the mega following FB has, for those of us who choose to think outside of the box, we can take advantage of what FB Timeline has to offer. The new FB Business Page is quite willing and built to serve as web communication central, if you choose to let it. The required new “face” of your ministry on FB will come with many new and exciting features that really are worth using to their full potential. Alas, there are also a few technicalities of which we all need to be aware:

Do you know if your ministry has a Facebook Business Page, or a Profile? You need to know the difference. Make sure your ministry is not using a Personal Profile as its Business Page. Back in the day, this was an easy mistake to make and many good intentioned volunteers did so in good conscience. Now however, Facebook considers this to be a direct violation of their TOS (Terms of Service). You may ask “What is the big deal, we’re just a small non-profit ministry?” First and foremost, it is important that our ministries operate within the law. Even when some might interpret it as just a small “rule”. It is important that we live by the high standard Jesus layed before us in all circumstances. James the “just” reminds us that,

As with any and every sin, pleading ignorance will earn no mercy. It may seem circumstantial, but FB has a legal right to impose their policies and they will. If you are in violation, you run the risk of the giant chewing up and spitting out your ministry’s identity, never to be found again in the cyber-world of FB. In Facebook’s mind, people (Personal Profiles) have “friends”, businesses (Business Pages) like your ministry, have “fans”. When you try to make the transition to get in compliance, if not handled with care, you run the risk of loosing all of your ministry’s friends as well as all of its potential fans.

In my early days in ministry I was full of excitement and passion. It seemed that my energy was boundless, I worked as a youth pastor, went to school, and managed to work another part time construction job to pay the bills. As I grew older and God blessed my wife and I with children, things began to get more complicated. My energy seemed to wane and I found myself stressed out, burned out, and coasting. The passion and excitement I had in those early days wasn’t gone, but it was on it’s way.      I went through a lot of pain, soul searching, prayer, and guidance from mentors before I identified the cause. I’ll admit, I still find myself struggling to maintain balance in these areas. Thankfully I have men in my life who will point out when I need to step back and readjust a few things. Take a look and see if any of these are issues you struggle with as well.

No matter how many people tell me how great the message was on Sunday, just one negative or overly critical person’s voice seems to drown out all the others. The problem isn’t with that one Negative Nelly, the problem is when we derive our feelings of success or satisfaction from people rather than from the Lord. If you are preaching from the Word of God, which is sharper than any two edged sword, sooner or later you will offend someone and offended people often lash out. When they do, it is easy to get down on yourself because of their hurtful words. Pastor Perry Noble, when speaking on the issue of critics in the church says,

However, by the same token, if your confidence rests on getting “attaboys” from certain people in your congregation you are playing with fire as well. In Luke 6:26 Jesus said, “Woe to you when all men speak well of you.”  The Bible is clear, we are first and foremost accountable to God, and our chief aim must be to please him.

When we allow the voice of the crowd and their opinion, whether positive or negative, to shape our sermons and leadership we are really allowing them to lead instead of following the Holy Spirit. Pastor you are the called and anointed leader of the church and your family. The Lord has entrusted, equipped, and called you to this task, at this time. Don’t let anyone strip away or diminish what the Lord has               called you to.

This is so natural to do, but it is also destructive. We compare numbers, facilities, budgets, even softball team records and when you do that, either way you fail. You end up either feeling like you don’t measure up or pridefully conclude that your ministry is better or more anointed than someone else’s. God wants us to be confidently humble, to be neither in envy of another or prideful over what God has done through our work. 1 Corinthians 3:6 makes it clear when Paul wrote “I planted the seed, Apollos watered it, but God made it grow.” God is the one doing the real work. The first question you need to answer is, “Am I being obedient?” I’ll take obedience over numbers any day. People will know we love Jesus not by how many people we cram in our churches, or by how big the offering was, but by how we obey. I also have this sneaking feeling that obedience leads to health, which leads to making disciples and growth in every significant area in the church. Pursue Christ through obedience, He will take care of the rest.

Current CIA Director, General David Patraeus, has stated that the human body is the ultimate weapons system. When well cared for, these bodies of ours are capable of amazing feats. However, when we are running on caffeine, subsisting on junk and fast food, and carrying too much excess baggage, we find ourselves running low on energy to the point where enthusiasm and passion just aren’t enough anymore. Not only do we have less energy, we are less productive with what we do have. Getting on a whole body health plan that addresses body, mind, and spirit is one of the most challenging things I have ever attempted to do. It takes discipline and commitment to be successful, but I find that when I take time to exercise, eat right, and fill my mind with good things, the dividends far outweigh the expenditures.

Ministry is lonely, but it doesn’t have to be. I have found that because pastors tend to struggle with 1 and 2 they often fail to build real relationships with other pastoral peers in their community. These are the men who know the load you carry, and have been down that same road you are on. Even pastors need relationships so that “iron can sharpen iron”. Younger pastors need to connect with more experienced pastors, and more experienced pastors need to pass on their knowledge and wisdom. Sadly, there are many that are more dedicated to their pet doctrines than they are to the unity Jesus prayed for in John 17:20-23 and Paul wrote about in Ephesians 4:1-16. We need to lay differences aside and find time to build relationships with other pastors for prayer, fellowship and support. Who knows if pastors led the way in this, entire communities just might follow suit!

As one called into ministry, the word “no” is both surprisingly hard to say and seems to be very offensive to people when they hear me say it. But everyone needs to hear it from time to time. After a spate of very early morning and middle of the night phone calls, I asked a person in the church to stop calling my home and to only call me during business hours at the office. It’s not that the calls were completely pointless, but they were disturbing my family’s rest and my family comes before anything but a legitimate emergency. There are people in your church and community that are needy and while they cannot be ignored, good boundaries must be put in place or everything else will suffer. There is simply not enough time or energy available to meet the needs of everyone around you and maintain the things God has called you to. Know where the line is and do not hesitate to draw it.

We are called to our personal walk with God first, to our spouses second, our families third, and then to our ministry. In that order. It is easy to get that out of whack and when we do, ministry becomes a mistress that attacks our marriages, families, and can ultimately destroy the church. Some pastors allow their walk with Christ to suffer because they replace it with sermon prep. If God is indeed desirous of relationship that is so often described in passionate and intimate terms, there needs to be passion and intimacy in your daily pursuit of Him. The same goes for your spouse. They need to know they are number one in your book and you can show that by making time, cultivating your relationship, and doing the little things that matter. Guess what? Your kids need that same type of relational cultivation. One requirement of ministry in both Titus and Timothy was a healthy home life. No, you don’t have to be June and Ward Cleaver. But you need to take care of your household first. As 1 Timothy 3:5 reminds us, “For if a man does not know how to manage his own family, how can he take care of the church of God?”

This is a big one. We often preach honor the Sabbath day and keep it holy, but it seems that many pastors struggle to maintain a consistent day of rest for themselves and their families. Here are some tips to a healthy Sabbath.

Set aside – a day each week specifically for rest.

Attitude – train your mind to stay off the work you need to get done at the office.

Boundary - again, unless it is an emergency, this is a day for you and your family to rest in the Lord.

Bible – Remember this isn’t a vacation away from the Word. The Bible is meant to refresh and reenergize so make time in your day for your own study.

All together – your family needs to be a part of this rest time as well, whenever possible. Plan time to be together.

Teach yourself – I have a stable of preaching podcasts I listen to for my own edification. This is not when I listen to leadership podcasts though. On my days off I specifically listen to preaching so that through hearing the Word my own faith might become activated.

The title of this article is a little tongue-in-cheek, but seriously, any one of these can lead to burning out, stressing out, and watering down your ministry. If you find yourself dealing with multiples of these, you may have a real problem on your hands and may need to see somebody. I know where my greatest struggles are and which ones come more easily, but I definitely have plenty of room to grow in all these areas. If you have anything to add I would love to hear it!

Pastor Kelly Rhoades
Featured Image: Dallas Health Helpers / Photobucket.com
1st Image: Graur Codrin / FreeDigitalPhotos.net
2nd Image: Photobucket.com

A few issues were arising at around the same time. For one thing, I made some decisions (not even major decisions) that were not popular. This led to some very nasty and untrue rumors about me. Also, a couple of people by this time had simply decided they didn’t like me. One person in particular would show up at my office at least once a week and tell me the things I “need to do.” When he saw that I only took some of his advice, he became very hostile toward me and started spreading the word that “the pastor thinks he knows everything and doesn’t listen to anyone” (he actually said this to my face). The worst thing, however, was that we had a new chairman of the personnel committee. I’m still not sure why, but this man who initially supported me, became my worst nightmare. Not only did he become extremely critical of me and the rest of the staff, but he proved to be a blatant liar. For example, when one of the committee members called me and urged me to attend the personnel committee meetings, I said, “I’ve never missed a meeting.” She said, “We’ve been meeting every week, and the chairman said he keeps asking you to come, but you refuse.” I had no idea they were meeting every week.

When I did meet with the committee the following week, I had already been experiencing about two years of false rumors and overt confrontations, so I was feeling somewhat beaten and much less confident. In the meeting, I was shocked at what I heard. They told me that “the church” was having “serious concerns about my leadership.” For one thing, I never visited hospitals. What? While I lived in a city with five hospitals (it once took me five hours to make one round of hospital visits), I rarely missed seeing a church member in the hospital. In fact, when the chairman’s father, who lived in another town, was in the hospital in our city, I visited him three times. Another issue was that I needed to start spending time with the staff. I said, “In addition to weekly staff meetings, weekly lunches together, frequent dinners in my home, and daily interactions in each others’ offices, how much time should I spend with them?” The response? “You don’t have weekly staff meetings.” When I produced a very thick file with four years of personal notes from the weekly staff meetings, they were unsatisfied, simply replying, “Well, the church doesn’t think you spend time with the staff, so you need to do something about it.” I was dumbfounded. I was being called on the carpet for these and other accusations that were demonstrably false, and the only reaction was that I needed to improve. Now don’t get me wrong. If they had actually told me of legitimate things I was doing wrong, I would have listened and made changes. That, however, was not the case. I just didn’t know what to do.

I decided to update my resume and post it on the placement site of the seminary where I was currently working on a degree. Every time I proceeded to upload the resume, however, I couldn’t bring myself to click the mouse. I wanted to leave, but I just didn’t have peace about putting my resume out. The previous pastor had been given a year’s salary and benefits to resign (in our denomination, an outright termination typically requires a 3/4 vote from the congregation, and that can be messy). I found myself praying that the committee would make the same offer the previous guy got. They never did.

Then a business opportunity appeared on my radar screen. A new coffee franchise was making a splash, and at a family member’s prompting, I decided to look into it. To make along story short, I was approved for a franchise, I found an ideal property, and I lined up funding. I was so fed up with being a pastor and being abused, I was going to go open a coffee house. I just wanted out.

Things at church were not improving, and I kept waiting for them to offer me a deal, but my mind was made up. I was going to go regardless of what they did. Then one morning before the sun came up, I was out running. As I turned up my street, my mind was preoccupied with my new career, and just as clearly as anything I’ve ever heard from God, He said to me, “That is not your calling.” That’s all He said, but I knew in that instant that I was called to preach—to pastor—and I could not possibly open a coffee shop. I showered and dressed with a new sense of my calling, and by God’s grace I was not going to let a personnel committee take that from me. I had a plan.

The thing is, I knew that only a small percentage of the church members opposed me. I knew that if a business meeting were called to vote me out of my position, the vote would never reach 3/4, or even simple majority. In fact, I suspected it would have been just the opposite. So I called a meeting of the personnel committee, and I told them, “I’m not resigning. If you want me to go, then call a meeting of the church, but I will not be bullied, and I will not step down. God has called me here, and I’m staying until he calls me elsewhere.” While most of the committee sat in stunned silence, the youngest member said, “I’m with my pastor. I’m tired of all this, and I refuse to be a part of it anymore.” From that point on, I had a revived sense of calling and purpose. It was life-changing.

What happened next was exciting as well as surprising. Some good, godly people decided to be like that young personnel committee member. They started standing up and speaking out, and they even started defending me from rumors. Some of our key leaders also started getting right with God. The church was slowly becoming more unified, and we were starting to see some positive signs, including some modest growth. I was content, and probably 98% of the church was as well. Things were good. Then a search committee called me. I was not looking, so I was not interested, but God was in it. I am now in a new ministry position, and I am so thankful to God that I am not running a coffee house. I’m also thankful that He caused me to stay in that situation until He made it possible for me to leave rightly. I still find it hard to believe I almost abandoned my calling. Thank God that His heavy hand was on me.

Pastor Mike